I grew up in a complicated family where emotional intelligence was lacking, and mental health challenges were prevalent. Emotions were frequently repressed, and they often manifested as anger and yelling. As you might imagine, I struggled to manage my own emotions and problems before I gained the tools to do so. I knew I felt anger, but I couldn’t understand or name its source. I coped by masking my pain through perfectionism and hiding the parts of myself that seemed ugly and unacceptable. When I finally allowed space for all of my emotions, I was able to begin processing my childhood experiences and let go of anger that no longer served me. I learned that when we suppress our pain and unpleasant emotions, they always find a way out, and often in destructive ways. When we make a choice to become vulnerable, constructively feel and express our emotions, and manage them with healthy coping skills, our best self is able to shine through.

I see therapy as a process similar to cleaning out a closet. You start by taking everything out, piece by piece. It’s likely going to look messy and feel overwhelming as you examine the items sitting in front of you. You’ll decide what can stay, what needs to go, and what can be repurposed. Once you’ve carefully sorted through each item, you can reorganize the closet in a meaningful, practical, and even a beautiful way. Therapy will often feel messy as you dig up old wounds and examine each part of yourself.  After some time and effort, however, you will be able to make sense of your life and all the events that have shaped it. Through this process you will feel greater peace, joy, and self-acceptance.

Our spiritual, social, emotional, cognitive and professional development can be messy, just like reorganizing a closet, and sometimes unpredictable and a bit scary.  That is totally okay! We often need a little extra support, to decipher the meaning of a complex and sometimes challenging life, from someone we can trust and confide in, and with whom we can be our messy selves, without judgment. My role as a therapist is to help you process, heal, and find meaning in all that life has thrown at you, and to support you, unconditionally, in the process.